I’m about to discuss something that many deem controversial. If what I write below disturbs you, it should. Please feel free to rant and rave with me our about me in the comment section!

I can’t get an unpadded bra for my daughter at Wal-Mart. It’s true! I’ve shopped there for three years now, looking for an unpadded bra for my now 13 year old daughter. For that matter, I can’t get an unpadded bra for ME there either. What I CAN get at Wal-Mart are push up bras, short skirts, tight and low cut pants, g-strings that say things like “party girl” and “Booty Call” and “Hot Chick” or clothing marketed by celebrity teen drug addicts. I can make sure my little girls are outfitted in the latest sexy-undead-cheerleader-in-a-short-skirt-with-fake-spangly-long-hair-and-fangs Halloween costume. I can buy her a Brats doll with high-heeled boots, leather and huge out-of-proportion lips and hips. I can make sure her role models are Hillary Duff, Mary Kate and Ashley and Brittany Spears.

The other day at Wal-Mart my 16yo son turned his head as a women walked by with low cut jeans and a tattoo on her lower back of a butterfly. She had flowing long blond hair and shook her hips with the fervor of a belly dancer. She got in line in the isle next to ours, and when she turned to pay we saw her 10-12 year old face. It was a surprise to say the least, and my husband gave me the raised eyebrow look of horror, my son hiding his face in his hands to stifle the groan of disappointment.

More and more young girls are feeling the need to be recognized in our society as sexy or even sexually available. Our magazines, television and movies portray women as being sexual objects. If you’ve seen my post on the Facebook ads, you ‘ll know that not only are we seeing overly beautified women in these outlets, but they are being altered to be made even more perfect. Do real women even exist any more? What is happening to our sons, when they see these women on television and in print? Do they have an idea of sexuality and what their future mate should look and act like?

I live in rural America. I’m not a city girl, nor do I understand all of the social pressures of living in an urban environment. Some of the things that occur in the city seem shocking to me. For example, I read recently that many salons are offering discounts to parents who bring in their daughters (as early as 8 years old) for pubic hair removal, claiming to “save these girls from years of waxing by removing pre-pubescent unwanted hair”. What? We’re giving brazilians to 8 year olds?!!!  What little girl is going to be OK with having some strange person rip the hair out of their tenders? I don’t understand the motivation for parents to put their children through this.

Nor do I understand the attitude that we as parents should give our children everything they want, and cave to the pleas of a 10 year old who wants to wear make up, leopard printed skin-tight lycra pants and high heels to school. In what way can that possibly be what is in her best interests?

Isn’t that what parents are for - deciding what is in our child’s best interests FOR THEM, because they are CHILDREN and cannot make those decisions for themselves? I’ve got news for you folks - they are CHILDREN UNTIL THEY ARE 18. They may even be children long after that. They need your help to make decisions that edify them and give them strength. It is our responsibility as parents to teach our little girls that they are far more valuable than their sexuality. That they have BRAINS and the “blond bimbo” attitude is beneath them.

The American Psychological Association (APA) has recently released a report from the Taskforce on the Sexualization of Girls. In it, they urge the media and advertisers to stop overly sexualizing young girls. In the report they address the consequences on our society for items like the thong (once used only by strippers, now offered in tween department store sections with images and phrases that appeal directly to children) and the inability of girls as young as 7 to deal with the pressures to present themselves in provocative ways.

In order to combat this social problem, adult women need to take a stand. Support magazines like “All You” the one smart move by Wal-Mart, that supports and beautifies women of all shapes and sizes, and even has underwear ads with gorgeous plus-sized models. Don’t shop for clothing for your child in a store that has overly sexualized clothing. If there are no local stores in your area that offer modest clothing for children, don’t be afraid to order online. I found some wonderful modest, non-padded bras for my daughter online and the shipping fees didn’t kill my pocketbook.

Encourage a young girl in your life. Uplift her, and tell her that she’s SMART. Support her in her efforts in science and math and entrepreneurialism. PROTECT young girls from inappropriate sexual clothing, magazines, TV ads, movies etc. Watch films before your child does, and discuss the ones that have materials that you find objectionable with her. Let her know how you feel. Show her the Dove Evolution campaign film on You Tube, and discuss how all women in print media are altered. Everyone is photoshoped - they remove pimples, stretch marks, blemishes, skin discolorations and more, and they add extra hair, enlarge the eyes, elongate the neck and even manipulate images to make breasts larger and tummies flatter! You can search You Tube for Extreme Photoshop Makeovers and see some amazing videos that will shock you and put a lot of things in perspective. Not all of these videos are appropriate for children, but many of them should be watched by both girls and boys to show how the pictures in magazines are not of real people!

Read these two books, and learn more about how to combat this unfortunately growing trend in our society.

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